dumbfucks.org

Boil? Still?

This was going to be my boil pot, but after receiving it and seeing the quality, I think it will be my still! A few holes, a few clamps, voila! For distilling biofuel only, obviously.Image/photo

MAKES NO SENSE!

No packet loss, no server issues, no outbound or inbound connectivity issues, but I GET DISCONNECTED FROM ZNC EVERY 2 MINUTES WTF WTF!">Image/photo
OK friends, this was a doozy. Eventually I figured out that my system clock was running twice as fast as it was supposed to through playing a certain game https://store.steampowered.com/app/600370/Paradigm/ with a rate that was way too fast. Once I reset my BIOS settings, the problem stopped! I have no idea what was misconfigured, but DAMN! That was a bitch to diagnose.

The hottest burger

So, if you visit Fountain Square in Indianapolis, like I did a month ago, you might be tempted to visit Kuma's Corner, https://kumascorner.com/location/kumas-indy/ to get food, especially in burger format. I wholeheartedly support this decision, as they are bloody wonderful. Great beer, great meat, great atmosphere, and great location! I do not recommend that you order their "hottest burger whatsoever" like I did. Don't get me wrong, I was able to eat my way through the burger, and enjoyed every minute of it, but... How do I put this politely? As much as my mouth enjoyed the burger, my intestines rejected it. Still, GO HERE! Where else are you going to find a burger joint with a heavy metal theme and the ability to actually spice up a burger good and well?

Amazing...

What is this world coming to where you can't ignore the cops trying to pull you over, throw your drugs out the window, fight the cops and get one's gun, without having to worry about your personal safety?

https://weartv.com/news/local/family-of-man-killed-in-officer-involved-shooting-speaks-out

"He then started throwing narcotics out the window."
"Police say he started fighting with police and disarmed an officer."
"A fight ensued after that. The individual attempted and then eventually did disarm one of the officers and the other officer fired his weapon, striking the suspect,"

"Tymar is a caring, loving, and a giving type of person,"
"With all the officers, they should have just restrained him,"
"It's just ridiculous that you can't even drive in your own neighborhood without fear of being victimized by the people who are supposed to be protecting you," said Kimbrough.

Kimbrough believes despite what police said happened, the driver shouldn't have been killed.

"He has family. He has kids. He grew up in this area and no matter the case he didn't deserve this. Nobody deserves this. They're not the judge. He didn't have a trial and now he didn't have a voice,"

Ol' Shirley's Buckets, with a watermark

my $filesList = `find /public/tobucket -maxdepth 1 -type f`;
my @filesToProc = split(/\n/, $filesList);
while(my $file = shift(@filesToProc)) {
my @filePath = split(/\//, $file);
my $fileName = pop(@filePath);
my @fileParts = split(/\./, $fileName);
my $fileBase = shift(@fileParts);
print "Processing $fileBase.\n";
# system("convert \"$file\" -trim -scale 972x1052! -fuzz 10\% -transparent white /tmp/1.png");
system("convert \"$file\" -trim -scale 972x1052 -fuzz 10\% -transparent white -fuzz 40\% -fill black -opaque \"#000000\" /tmp/1.png");
if (! -e '/public/craftycottage/watermarkbucket.png') {
system("convert \"/public/craftycottage/watermark.png\" -trim -scale 972x1052 /public/craftycottage/watermarkbucket.png");
}
my $newFileName = '/public/tobucket/done/' . $fileBase . '.png';
system("composite -gravity center -geometry +50-0 /tmp/1.png /public/butketblank.png \"$newFileName\"");
system("composite -gravity center -geometry +50-0 /public/craftycottage/watermarkbucket.png \"$newFileName\" \"$newFileName\"");
unlink($file);
}
unlink('/tmp/bucketrunning');
#


Ol' Shirley's Buckets

Apparently there's a craze now for translucent buckets with LED lights inside them with cutesy sayings on them. Ol' Shirley, with her vinyl printer, is jumping on this. She has a metric fuckton of designs she has purchased, but only so many buckets. I popped open a zencart site for her, and was able to use imagemagick to make it look like she has a ton of inventory:

#!/usr/bin/perl
if (-e '/tmp/bucketrunning') {
die "Already running.";
}
system("touch /tmp/bucketrunning");
my $filesList = `find /public/tobucket -maxdepth 1 -type f`;
my @filesToProc = split(/\n/, $filesList);
while(my $file = shift(@filesToProc)) {
my @filePath = split(/\//, $file);
my $fileName = pop(@filePath);
my @fileParts = split(/\./, $fileName);
my $fileBase = shift(@fileParts);
print "Processing $fileBase.\n";
system("convert \"$file\" -trim -scale 972x1052! -fuzz 10\% -transparent white /tmp/1.png");
my $newFileName = '/public/tobucket/done/' . $fileBase . '.png';
system("composite -gravity center -geometry +50-0 /tmp/1.png /public/butketblank.png \"$newFileName\"");
unlink($file);
}
unlink('/tmp/bucketrunning');

She dumps the images in the folder on our public drive, imagemagick works, well... magick, and there ya go. It's not like she is fooling anybody, she can rip one of these designs out in a matter of minutes.

Truck woes

Get truck brake line fixed: "Should be about $200, mate"
Repair shop calls: "Hey, uhhh, while we were test driving it, another line broke!"

At least they were cool about it and gave a little discount to repair the second line. These guys are pretty legit and down to earth: https://www.tuffyautopensacola.com/

The truck sold for $1500 today.

Infected Mushroom

Normally I need some lyrics with my music, but DAMN Infected Mushroom is good shit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_uS0aT0bG8

DON'T PUT A POOL UDER A PINE TREE

Why? This is fucking why! Put the kid's playset on Craigslist to make room for the pool, she never fucking plays on it anyways!

Image/photo

SHE. NEVER. GOES. OUTSIDE. GET. RID. OF. THE. PLAYSET.


Shit, I'm going to need more couch-to-fridge stickers! SHIRLEY!!!!!

FUCK TRUCK!

<3 ECLIPSE!

New car, w00ts! Jesus this thing is fast! 2006 Mitsubishi Eclipse 3.6L V6. VROOM!">Image/photoImage/photo

OMG, poor truck!

Who did this to you, sweet child?Image/photo

HELP ME!

What in the everloving fuck is going on here????? https://youtu.be/AIXUgtNC4Kc?t=106

From the couch to the fridge

Yeah, you run, I get it, but I'm fatter and therefore, happier. Ol' Shirley has a vinyl printer, and I have ideas!
Image/photo

Look at these magnificent bastards:Image/photo

FUCK

Idiot brakes are fucking fucked. Is it the master cylinder? Or rust on the big metal fucker behind it? Calling my baller negihbour to push the brake while I get brake fluid shot in my eye ala the work xmas party where Bruce ruined it with his masturbation.

My pool, for cosmicfires

Shit's going VIRAL, dawg.

I hope its everything you wanted: https://youtu.be/3NFb91TicmU
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